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Retired Words
Gorgeous and stunning.
Perfection and favorite.
You will remain hers.

-BRM3 

Mr. Market

Annualized 
Short Vega is much
like the yen carry. It works
until it doesn't.

Jimmy C. 
Catch the falling knife,
in the after-hours trade.
Booyah I scream.

Technical vs. Fundamental 
The chartists agree;
there is no optimal scale.
What feels right? It's wrong.

Deep Value 
Look out B. Graham, 
many fortunes read only:
B.K. de-list now.

Pre-Decimal 
You can carbon date
a trader by the shoe size
to a drill bit line.   

Word, 

-I Heart Palindromes

Sunday Reflections

There is no better metaphor for living in Los Angeles than what I witnessed last night on the 405: an asian woman, on her cell phone, with her hazard lights on, driving in the middle of two lanes of traffic, fifteen miles per hour below the posted speed limit. Yep, that about sums up the personality of the southern half of this state.

It isn't all bad. As I write this I am mentally preparing for my Sunday stretch run as the weather here has allowed me to dellude myself into thinking that I'm going to run a marathon. I have 176 miles under my belt in the past two months -- time flies. I never thought I would be one of those people that employed the impressive scale within the GPS technology niche to know such statistics. Alas, the pacific ocean does weird things to people. I actually know what gluten-free means, the odds were stacked fairly heavily against that. I can't help but take that with me when I leave.

So, my golf game is much improved, which is nice. I haven't spent 60 hours of a week in the office for about two months, which is a record.  I spent my weekend downloading new music; I pride myself on my ability to source good new music. It's the hipster that lives deep-deep inside me I suppose. I am made oddly happy that my iPod now includes six new bands I had never heard of when I woke up yesterday. Authenticity and all that. I need something to balance out all the Marky-Mark I've got on there. What? He's a musical genius. Probably a non-descript genius as well. These are facts.

I want to be sitting outside at Martha's with Boondock surrounded by pups and house-wives right now. I will settle for excruciating pain as I run in slow motion along the pacific instead. Word.

I Heart Palindromes (Philosophy Major)
It's like that moment where you come to a stop
on the train tracks. No train for miles but you can't
help but feel a twinge of panic, a sense of palpable risk.
At one moment or another you realize that life is,
to a great extent, risk.
That's why evolution wired us that way.
We were built for this.

I Heart Palindromes (Finance Major)
You can manage your Delta but no one can account
for Vega. There's no underlying you can hedge
that out with. That isn't normally distributed either,
there's some ugly negative skew in Vega, if you forget that
your spread disappears. Nickles in front of a steam-roller,
they say. Knowing that makes all the difference.
Because I have a natural position; in me.

-I Heart Palindromes

Friend! Part Trois

What can I say, when it rains it pours:

So I got pulled over for the 3^rd time for my lack of inspection today. However, this time I’m within the 15 day rejection window. I was stopped by a motorcycle cop on I-64 on my  way back into work (Stu your Bav Auto parts are at the house by the way). The trooper pulls me over on an uphill highway exit:

Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over

The General: Inspection

Cop: Yes, why isn’t you car inspected?

The General: It was, but it was rejected

Cop: Where is your rejection sticker?

The General: hands Cop rejection sticker

Cop: Why isn’t this on your windshield

The General: It fell off. I am within the 15 day window

Cop looks at sticker

Cop: It says you were rejected for brakes. Do you think its safe

to drive a car without good functioning brakes?

The General: Officer my brakes are fine, it failed for a loose drivers side parking brake cable.

Cop: So your parking brake doesn’t work?

The General: No it does, there is one on each side of the car, one side is loose that’s all. The other side works great.

Cop: So your parking brake isn’t functioning…

The General: Sir, with all due respect if my parking brake wasn’t functioning my car would have rolled down this hill and over your motorcycle by now.

Cop: (chuckles) You know you might have a point there. Please get your car inspected soon. Have a nice day. 

Word,

-I Heart Palindromes

Friend! Part Deux

What is below came across my wire courtesy of The General. My favorite part would, of course, be the practical advice given about how to respond to a Goose attack, which sounds oddly similar to how to respond to a Bear attack. This is a little bird-hate shout-out.

Within the last week or so we have had reports of geese on the property attacking people as they leave or enter the building.  As a reminder we are  requesting the wildlife on site no longer be fed by ANYONE.

Geese have adapted to the ponds and maintained lawns in our area which has unfortunately placed employees and geese in close proximity to one another.  This is especially apparent now (the spring season) when geese are aggressively defending their nesting territories. 

When fed by humans, geese tend to lose their natural fear of people.  This lack of fear often leads to more violent attacks during the spring season.  In addition, when geese lose their fear they begin to nest close to areas that people frequent such as buildings, flower beds, parking lots, etc which has occurred on our site. 

In order to prevent anymore attacks to employees everyone MUST STOP FEEDING geese ASAP.  This request is being made to safeguard the health and safety of everyone located at the West mark campus.

WHAT TO DO IF A GOOSE ATTACKS

• Maintain direct eye contact and keep your chest and face pointed at the goose
• If the goose acts aggressively, calmly and slowly back away, watching for obstacles
• Maintain a neutral demeanor, try not to act hostile or show fear

We appreciate everyone’s cooperation as we try to deter the geese from the property.

 Be safe out there,


-I Heart Palindromes

Lost In Translation

I have a new favorite holding company:

Thank you broker spam e-mails for making my Monday AM.

Word,

-I Heart Palindromes

Haiku Part Cinq

Sunny weekend -- missing a partner in crime but making the most of it. I am becoming disturbed at how tan I am. This is not how I Heart Palindromes is supposed to look. I suppose there are worse arrows of fate one could suffer. Craving a Sunday bar date with Boondock. I'll settle for a hamburger with the Cubs on TV. Oh, and Haiku.


Saved By The Bell
Screech was a stalker.
Somehow it was endearing.
Not so much now though.


Dinosaurs
Likely the apex
of modern society.
Animatronics!


GUTS
Agro-crag dreams and
glitter explosions. Somehow
it was topical.


Hey Dude
You can carbon-date the
the writing because the rich
girl* was from Detroit.

*for those that don't recall; her name was Brad.

Hey Dude (2) 
New Yorker freaks out,
buys a dude ranch? I don't know,
odds were on a Porche.

Alf
Can you really watch
this without thinking about
the midget in there?

Not my best work, getting back into the swing of it. Almost there.


Word,


-I Heart Palindromes

Friend!

An excerpt from an e-mail entitled "BULL RIDING". Yes, this is par for the course with my friends:

Getting drunk is awesome.  Riding a bull is more awesome.  That's why I will spend one weekend going to the Wicked R Bull riding training class on May 7th and 8th.  It is a mere 2 hours away in Wyoming, Delaware.  The two-day class features safety tips and riding techniques.  The first day starts with a mechanical bull and moves on to a "beginner" bull.  The second day gives us the chance to go eight seconds on a real bull.  Fuck. Yes.

Saturday night is spent in the cowboy bunkhouse and includes a barbeque/bonfire.  Are you ready?  Let's do this.

Yeefuckinghaw,
 

The Hammer

http://www.wickedr.com/

Word,

-I Heart Palindromes