Having switched jobs four times since I left undergrad I am on just about every FIG head-hunter mailing list known to man. This little gem came across at some point last week:
"MANDARIN speaking Pre-MBA Analyst needed for PE FOF/Secondaries team"
Don't you think they could have been a little more specific? Let me get this straight, you need a 22-26 year old analyst who has experience in the secondary market for qualified purchaser securities? Oh, and they have to speak Chinese? Oh, a specific Chinese dialect? Of course.
Well, at least that HR department really knows what they're looking for, I hope they were light on the other requirements. I suppose this is better than what every other head-hunter e-mail is really headlined with in reality:
"Seeking well educated white ivy league graduate with mediocre golf game and minimal social life (or robust social life but substance dependency) which allows for 100 hour weeks. CFA preferred."
Word,
Dino B
24 February 2011
22 February 2011
Vampire Tigers, Dinos & Palindromes
Have you ever noticed those patterns in life? I swear by them. Neptune and all.
I just returned from a week on the north shore of Kauai where I was reminded why that place has always been so special to me. I almost forgot how centered I can become 2,000 miles away (literally) from everything. When you leave my intellect and self to... itself, it becomes so sure and calm. There is none of the perpetual racing, just rapid comprehension. The stress of life is a bit like ambiant light I suppose, it just obscures the stars, it doesn't dim them.
So what about the fact that Hawaii's sole area code is palindromic (808) and so is Midtown's (212). To make matters more certain Chicago (312) and Los Angeles (213) are mirror images and near-but-not-quite palindromes. A good head-fake but not the real thing.
What do you suppose that means?
I have a theory.
So certain and cool.
Few can keep up pace with her.
Well, I have strong legs.
Word.
-I Heart Palindromes
I just returned from a week on the north shore of Kauai where I was reminded why that place has always been so special to me. I almost forgot how centered I can become 2,000 miles away (literally) from everything. When you leave my intellect and self to... itself, it becomes so sure and calm. There is none of the perpetual racing, just rapid comprehension. The stress of life is a bit like ambiant light I suppose, it just obscures the stars, it doesn't dim them.
So what about the fact that Hawaii's sole area code is palindromic (808) and so is Midtown's (212). To make matters more certain Chicago (312) and Los Angeles (213) are mirror images and near-but-not-quite palindromes. A good head-fake but not the real thing.
What do you suppose that means?
I have a theory.
So certain and cool.
Few can keep up pace with her.
Well, I have strong legs.
Word.
-I Heart Palindromes
13 February 2011
10 February 2011
Jameson Macallan Murphy
Only modestly Irish. My friend Babson just moved from SFO to Chicago. He is originally from Boston. He, much like myself, was born to this world with a name that screams Irish. He moved to Chicago for his girlfriend and last night told me that he was surprised to find the city so well set-up for an American Irishman. I really thought he was more observant than that. He'll be in tow for the Death March in... March (now if only someone would actually die on this thing the circle of clever-pun-ness would be complete). I have odds on Bobster The Lobster. Trust me, these pseudonyms actually make sense if you meet these people. Well, for the most part. Boondock was more because I knew she'd like it than because she murdered sinners. OK, more like 75/25 split I suppose. I did most things because I thought she'd like them, it just seemed to make sense that way.
The Hammer
I did not know the
irony of naming you
after a lawyer.
The General
At home in the seat
of the south. You know, or eight
mile in Detragic.
... To be continued ...
Word,
-I Heart Palindromes
The Hammer
I did not know the
irony of naming you
after a lawyer.
The General
At home in the seat
of the south. You know, or eight
mile in Detragic.
... To be continued ...
Word,
-I Heart Palindromes
09 February 2011
Rawr!
Los Angeles: 5,383 -- I Heart Palindromes: 0
SOUTH PASADENA -- South Pasadena authorities say they were called out to rescue a man who was treed by a pack of imaginary pumas.
Police Sgt. Brian Solinksy tells the San Gabriel Valley Tribune that officers got a report around 3:30 a.m. Tuesday that a man was struck in a tree on St. Albans Avenue.
He says the man had been drinking and believed he was being chased by a pack of mountain lions. He climbed the tree to escape and got stuck 20 feet in the air.
However, authorities say the man managed to climb down on his own when firefighters arrived.
Solinksy says the 41-year-old Los Angeles man was arrested on suspicion of being drunk in public and was held until he sobered up.
Simba,
-I Heart Plaindromes
SOUTH PASADENA -- South Pasadena authorities say they were called out to rescue a man who was treed by a pack of imaginary pumas.
Police Sgt. Brian Solinksy tells the San Gabriel Valley Tribune that officers got a report around 3:30 a.m. Tuesday that a man was struck in a tree on St. Albans Avenue.
He says the man had been drinking and believed he was being chased by a pack of mountain lions. He climbed the tree to escape and got stuck 20 feet in the air.
However, authorities say the man managed to climb down on his own when firefighters arrived.
Solinksy says the 41-year-old Los Angeles man was arrested on suspicion of being drunk in public and was held until he sobered up.
Simba,
-I Heart Plaindromes
03 February 2011
Lazards, Tiger Cubs and Bear Stearns -- Oh, My.
Just a quick stop by today in the middle of a very busy week in the office. I didn't want the inter-web to think that I had forgotten about it though, I hear it can be very jealous.
I had a meeting with a Goldman Sachs product-rep yesterday (this is to be distinguished from a salesperson because a product guy has generally actually traded something in his lifetime). This particular guy was an ex-CBOT runner from the same era as me, small-worldness between two average looking white dudes who both went to college and work in finance isn't really surprising -- but gee-golly it's still fun. In any event, he was out to explain that Goldman's latest and greatest product innovation was a swap agreement tied to the forward curve for Euro Stoxx 50 dividends (as in swaps around say, the level of 2012 dividends). This market exists because options trade ex-dividends (generally) which means that options portfolios that use equity baskets to hedge their delta end up sticking Goldman with the short dividend risk on the physical equities (yeeeeah, I know, sorry I'm a huge finance nerd). Anyway, I just found it staggering that product innovation continues to be like this, absolutely crazy. More surprising, he told me that he's gotten a few endowments and foundations to actually get long the dividend forward swap. Goldman can sell anything! I actually liked this guy, no bullshit, very smart, straight-forward about the real risks of either side of the trade (and the real reason that GS is incentivized to dump this risk from their execution desks). I know no one will find this interesting... maybe Boondock.
More common fare, Haiku part trois:
Lazard Freres
No balance sheet here,
just a direct line to the
president. Not bad.
Goldman Sachs
All respect was lost,
the day I found out that you
hired Jim Cramer.
Raymond James
Oh Ray-J how cute.
You built your HQ down in
Florida? Too much.
Bank of America
Southern bankers meet
New York traders. I think
we know how that ends.
Back when I was first out of undergrad and spending far too much time with investment bankers in mid-town (they found me a novelty, hedge fund guy straight out of a mid-tier public university) we used to have a lot of fun using firm names as verbs/adjectives.
If a guy was being secretive or obtuse about whether or not he was dating girl A or girl B he was Lazard'ing us. If he was trying to date a girl that was way out of his league he was Bank of America'ing the date. If he was so over-served that he had issues telling the cab driver what the cross streets of his apartment were he was Mr. James, and he'd be mocked for forgetting which dock in Tampa he left his sail-boat at. If he had fallen asleep at the bar and was being preyed upon by a girl eight years his senior he was Stifel. These remain useful short-hands.
Word,
-I Heart Palindromes
I had a meeting with a Goldman Sachs product-rep yesterday (this is to be distinguished from a salesperson because a product guy has generally actually traded something in his lifetime). This particular guy was an ex-CBOT runner from the same era as me, small-worldness between two average looking white dudes who both went to college and work in finance isn't really surprising -- but gee-golly it's still fun. In any event, he was out to explain that Goldman's latest and greatest product innovation was a swap agreement tied to the forward curve for Euro Stoxx 50 dividends (as in swaps around say, the level of 2012 dividends). This market exists because options trade ex-dividends (generally) which means that options portfolios that use equity baskets to hedge their delta end up sticking Goldman with the short dividend risk on the physical equities (yeeeeah, I know, sorry I'm a huge finance nerd). Anyway, I just found it staggering that product innovation continues to be like this, absolutely crazy. More surprising, he told me that he's gotten a few endowments and foundations to actually get long the dividend forward swap. Goldman can sell anything! I actually liked this guy, no bullshit, very smart, straight-forward about the real risks of either side of the trade (and the real reason that GS is incentivized to dump this risk from their execution desks). I know no one will find this interesting... maybe Boondock.
More common fare, Haiku part trois:
Lazard Freres
No balance sheet here,
just a direct line to the
president. Not bad.
Goldman Sachs
All respect was lost,
the day I found out that you
hired Jim Cramer.
Raymond James
Oh Ray-J how cute.
You built your HQ down in
Florida? Too much.
Bank of America
Southern bankers meet
New York traders. I think
we know how that ends.
Back when I was first out of undergrad and spending far too much time with investment bankers in mid-town (they found me a novelty, hedge fund guy straight out of a mid-tier public university) we used to have a lot of fun using firm names as verbs/adjectives.
If a guy was being secretive or obtuse about whether or not he was dating girl A or girl B he was Lazard'ing us. If he was trying to date a girl that was way out of his league he was Bank of America'ing the date. If he was so over-served that he had issues telling the cab driver what the cross streets of his apartment were he was Mr. James, and he'd be mocked for forgetting which dock in Tampa he left his sail-boat at. If he had fallen asleep at the bar and was being preyed upon by a girl eight years his senior he was Stifel. These remain useful short-hands.
Word,
-I Heart Palindromes
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)